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10 Things You Don't Know About Women By Parker Posey
(it's not the usual bitchy kind)

1. Compulsive hair playing equals great, unbridled passion, but not necessarily directed toward you or toward anyone in particular. In my latest book, The Secret Language of Hair, I attempt to bridge the communication gap between hair gesture and meaning.

2. You know those places that only sell smell-good, girlie products? There is a patron saint of these places--perhaps a cult leader--and that's all I can say.

3. When you see a woman chewing gum, she is counting. Next time you see a woman chewing gum, ask her what number she's up to.

4. Personally, I'm not one for lingerie. It would make me wonder where the cameras are rolling. Contrary to popular "culture," not every woman feels her best when she's dressed up looking like she was paid for. Not that that's bad. I'm just saying . . .

5. Some women, when they like someone, start to sulk rather than flirt. "I like him; now I'm depressed." Like in grade school, when boys threw rocks at girls they had crushes on. You are now that guy.

6. Often men confuse pensiveness with bitchiness, and I find that insulting!

7. An interesting way to a woman's heart is the gift of a self-help book.

8. Next time a woman is acting crazy, break into applause and see what happens.

9. If you can build something, brag about it, even if it's making sandwiches. Women love hearing about nice things you can do with your hands. Showing your hands off in moments of exasperation or self-explanation can be attractive to some women. Doing it in excess can drive her crazy!

10. Which brings me back to compulsive hair playing. Remember, romantic love is a theatrical experience, and some women love a good hair competition. "Look at me!" "No, look at me!" This could go on for hours--and it does.

el que quiera azul celeste, que le cueste.